The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that terrorising the elderly residents of a tranquil Gloucestershire village is becoming ever more common, then we learn that paedophiles are burning policemen at the stake every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack paedophiles burning policemen at the stake was Ian Dunkin-Donuts who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..