The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone is becoming ever more common, then we learn that coloureds are threatening to smash up branches of McDonalds and Starbucks every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack coloureds threatening to smash up branches of McDonalds and Starbucks was an unnamed source who today said Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts..