Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps have been threatening to smash up branches of McDonalds and Starbucks outside nursery schools.

Terror expert The English People has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Threatening to smash up branches of McDonalds and Starbucks: The True Face Of Evil", The English People says, "yet again these oafs have destroyed my evening.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.