Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Followers of Hugo Chavez have been smoking skunk in the halls of Parliament outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Ian Dunkin-Donuts has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Smoking skunk in the halls of Parliament: The True Face Of Evil", Ian Dunkin-Donuts says, "these dole-scrounging n’er-do-wells must be eliminated at all costs.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for followers of Hugo Chavez. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.