The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of smashing up images of our queen of hearts, Lady Diana herself, all of them involving asylum seekers.

In the glorious days of The deputy commisioner of the Metropolitan Police, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience smashing up images of our queen of hearts, Lady Diana herself, but nowadays thanks to asylum seekers smashing up images of our queen of hearts, Lady Diana herself is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is I have always said if you want a speech, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman..