With schools turning out a generation of illiterate hoodlums, crime threatening our every movement and a Government that treats criminals with kid gloves rather than forcibly immasculating them, is it any wonder that, once more glue-sniffing teenagers have been defacing statues in Trafalgar Square?

What is needed is some very serious discipline. We can beat sense into glue-sniffing teenagers - all it takes is a little British spunk, some backbone and a big stick.

Instead sickos, perverts and communists are allowed to crawl the streets with impunity. Defacing statues in Trafalgar Square must no longer be tolerated, especially when perpetrated by glue-sniffing teenagers.

Speaking exclusively to the Mail about glue-sniffing teenagers, Some bloke in the pub said "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.".