Why, Oh Why, Oh Why do we allow homosexuals such freedom? Not only are they probably communists, but homosexuals have this week been revealed as being involved in the death of Princess Diana (God rest her precious soul).

If only the Government and the guacomole-munchers of Islington were a little less concerned with helping Johnny-foreigner and a little more concerned with the rights of the hard working majority of our glorious Nation, then perhaps homosexuals would not get away with such treachery.

That certainly seems to be the opinion of Lala from the teletubbies who this week said, "Waterboarding is not torture".

So, next time you are at a dinner party and the menu involves sun dried tomatoes, just consider whether you think that being involved in the death of Princess Diana (God rest her precious soul) is acceptable behaviour.