The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals, all of them involving Jeremy Corbyn-admiring lefty scum.

In the glorious days of David Cameron, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals, but nowadays thanks to Jeremy Corbyn-admiring lefty scum pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is I think hanging is too good for them; Its time to consider the reintroduction of crucifiction, especially for criminals..