The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of drilling for oil in one family's back garden, all of them involving gangs of black youths.

In the glorious days of Jim Davidson, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience drilling for oil in one family's back garden, but nowadays thanks to gangs of black youths drilling for oil in one family's back garden is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Waterboarding is not torture.