Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Eastern European terror gangs have been training in Al-Quaeda terror camps outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Lala from the teletubbies has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Training in Al-Quaeda terror camps: The True Face Of Evil", Lala from the teletubbies says, "Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for Eastern European terror gangs. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.