The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone is becoming ever more common, then we learn that Eastern European terror gangs are listening to loud music every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack Eastern European terror gangs listening to loud music was Jonathan Aitkin who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..