Why, Oh Why, Oh Why do we allow Guardian-reading do-gooders such freedom? Not only are they probably communists, but Guardian-reading do-gooders have this week been revealed as selling heroin to the unions.

If only the Government and the guacomole-munchers of Islington were a little less concerned with helping Johnny-foreigner and a little more concerned with the rights of the hard working majority of our glorious Nation, then perhaps Guardian-reading do-gooders would not get away with such treachery.

That certainly seems to be the opinion of Enoch Powell who this week said, "we are coming slowly, painfully to an autumn of understanding, I hope it will be followed by a winter of common sense.".

So, next time you are at a dinner party and the menu involves sun dried tomatoes, just consider whether you think that selling heroin to the unions is acceptable behaviour.