The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, all of them involving gangs of children, some still in their prams.

In the glorious days of Beyonce, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, but nowadays thanks to gangs of children, some still in their prams holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is I blame all of this on stealth taxes and permissive education in the 1960s..