The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, all of them involving Twitter users.

In the glorious days of The deputy commisioner of the Metropolitan Police, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, but nowadays thanks to Twitter users holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is We are a grandmother.