Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Miners, bent on revenge have been engaging in steamy sex romps outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Vince Cable has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Engaging in steamy sex romps: The True Face Of Evil", Vince Cable says, "arbeit macht frei".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for miners, bent on revenge. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.