Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of smoking skunk in the halls of Parliament has been perpetrated by followers of Hugo Chavez.

The Mail can reveal that followers of Hugo Chavez are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

The deputy commisioner of the Metropolitan Police said of the followers of Hugo Chavez, "society needs to condemn a little more and understand a little less.".