The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone is becoming ever more common, then we learn that followers of Hugo Chavez are terrorising the elderly residents of a tranquil Gloucestershire village every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack followers of Hugo Chavez terrorising the elderly residents of a tranquil Gloucestershire village was David Cameron who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..