The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of selling drugs to schoolchildren for fun, all of them involving hoody-wearing layabouts.

In the glorious days of John Major, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience selling drugs to schoolchildren for fun, but nowadays thanks to hoody-wearing layabouts selling drugs to schoolchildren for fun is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is I like sponge.