Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of smashing up images of our queen of hearts, Lady Diana herself has been perpetrated by young muslim men.

The Mail can reveal that young muslim men are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

Winston Churchill, speaking through a medium said of the young muslim men, "I blame all of this on stealth taxes and permissive education in the 1960s.".