Why, Oh Why, Oh Why do we allow anarchists such freedom? Not only are they probably communists, but anarchists have this week been revealed as eating babies.

If only the Government and the guacomole-munchers of Islington were a little less concerned with helping Johnny-foreigner and a little more concerned with the rights of the hard working majority of our glorious Nation, then perhaps anarchists would not get away with such treachery.

That certainly seems to be the opinion of Ian Dunkin-Donuts who this week said, "Ban this sick filth".

So, next time you are at a dinner party and the menu involves sun dried tomatoes, just consider whether you think that eating babies is acceptable behaviour.