Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of helping so-called migrants has been perpetrated by Cherie Blair’s friends.

The Mail can reveal that Cherie Blair’s friends are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

Richard Littlejohn said of the Cherie Blair’s friends, "we are coming slowly, painfully to an autumn of understanding, I hope it will be followed by a winter of common sense.".