The Mail has learned that Islamist youths are responsible for plotting to kidnap a senior royal.

Has the world gone mad? Islamist youths are plotting to kidnap a senior royal with impunity. Hanging is surely too good for these no good scum. Why doesn’t the Government use all the money it has stolen from the hardworking families of Britain in stealth taxes to make amends for the situation. Probably because they are too busy lining their pockets!

The Mail spoke to Beyonce, who said "make no mistake if this is allowed to continue Armageddon shall surely be upon us and woe betide all who would seek to impose upon us a surveillance society. For on that day the right shall inherit the Earth!"