The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, all of them involving glue-sniffing teenagers.

In the glorious days of Bernard Jenkin, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields, but nowadays thanks to glue-sniffing teenagers holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Make no mistake if this is allowed to continue Armageddon shall surely be upon us and woe betide all who would seek to impose upon us a surveillance society. For on that day the right shall inherit the Earth!.