Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace have been training in Al-Quaeda terror camps outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Lala from the teletubbies has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Training in Al-Quaeda terror camps: The True Face Of Evil", Lala from the teletubbies says, "kill the poor".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.