The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of helping illegal immigrants, all of them involving ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy.

In the glorious days of Amanda Platell, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience helping illegal immigrants, but nowadays thanks to ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy helping illegal immigrants is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is A glorious thousand-year reich seems like the only practical choice to stem the tide of economic migrants.