The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of being foreign and suspicious looking, all of them involving followers of Hugo Chavez.

In the glorious days of John Major, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience being foreign and suspicious looking, but nowadays thanks to followers of Hugo Chavez being foreign and suspicious looking is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is As I look ahead, I am filled with foreboding. Like the Roman, I seem to see the River Tiber foaming with much blood..