Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of trolling social media users has been perpetrated by lesbians.

The Mail can reveal that lesbians are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

Angela Merkel said of the lesbians, "Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts.".