The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of listening to loud music, all of them involving ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy.

In the glorious days of Winston Churchill, speaking through a medium, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience listening to loud music, but nowadays thanks to ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy listening to loud music is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is We are coming slowly, painfully to an autumn of understanding, I hope it will be followed by a winter of common sense..