The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that causing cancer is becoming ever more common, then we learn that lesbians are causing obesity every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack lesbians causing obesity was Ian Dunkin-Donuts who today said Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts..