The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that setting fire to libraries is becoming ever more common, then we learn that hoody-wearing layabouts are pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack hoody-wearing layabouts pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals was Winston Churchill, speaking through a medium who today said Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts..