Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Young single mothers have been sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Norman Tebbit has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone: The True Face Of Evil", Norman Tebbit says, "If only we had a privitised National Identity scheme this would never have happened".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for young single mothers. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.