Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Glue-sniffing teenagers have been binge drinking on council estates outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Mr I.P.Freely of Tunbridge Wells has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Binge drinking on council estates: The True Face Of Evil", Mr I.P.Freely of Tunbridge Wells says, "As I look ahead, I am filled with foreboding. Like the Roman, I seem to see the River Tiber foaming with much blood.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for glue-sniffing teenagers. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.