Why, Oh Why, Oh Why do we allow glue-sniffing teenagers such freedom? Not only are they probably communists, but glue-sniffing teenagers have this week been revealed as sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone.

If only the Government and the guacomole-munchers of Islington were a little less concerned with helping Johnny-foreigner and a little more concerned with the rights of the hard working majority of our glorious Nation, then perhaps glue-sniffing teenagers would not get away with such treachery.

That certainly seems to be the opinion of Jeremy Clarkson who this week said, "Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets.".

So, next time you are at a dinner party and the menu involves sun dried tomatoes, just consider whether you think that sacrificing goats to a gilded image of Ken Livingstone is acceptable behaviour.