The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of burning policemen at the stake, all of them involving unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace.

In the glorious days of David Cameron, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience burning policemen at the stake, but nowadays thanks to unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace burning policemen at the stake is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Yet again these oafs have destroyed my evening..