The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of using skateboards and yobbish language to molest journalists, all of them involving yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps.

In the glorious days of Jacob Rees-Mogg, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience using skateboards and yobbish language to molest journalists, but nowadays thanks to yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps using skateboards and yobbish language to molest journalists is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Surely something can be done?.