Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of helping illegal immigrants has been perpetrated by communist-sympathisers.
The Mail can reveal that communist-sympathisers are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.
Norman Tebbit said of the communist-sympathisers, "make no mistake if this is allowed to continue Armageddon shall surely be upon us and woe betide all who would seek to impose upon us a surveillance society. For on that day the right shall inherit the Earth!".