The Mail has learned that hoodies are responsible for terrorising innocent investment bankers.

Has the world gone mad? Hoodies are terrorising innocent investment bankers with impunity. Hanging is surely too good for these no good scum. Why doesn’t the Government use all the money it has stolen from the hardworking families of Britain in stealth taxes to make amends for the situation. Probably because they are too busy lining their pockets!

The Mail spoke to Beyonce, who said "our prisons are like holiday camps."