I’m not racist but surely allowing Jeremy Corbyn-admiring lefty scum to flout our British way of life means that things have gone too far? Urinating on the Union Jack is just not British.

Some leftists will predictably argue that Jeremy Corbyn-admiring lefty scum aren’t urinating on the Union Jack in reality. But reality has a well known left-wing bias. Lala from the teletubbies agrees with me, saying today, "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.".

Let’s kick out the sickos and reclaim our traditional British heritage.