The Mail has learned that Noam Chomsky devotees are responsible for holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields.

Has the world gone mad? Noam Chomsky devotees are holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields with impunity. Hanging is surely too good for these no good scum. Why doesn’t the Government use all the money it has stolen from the hardworking families of Britain in stealth taxes to make amends for the situation. Probably because they are too busy lining their pockets!

The Mail spoke to Boris Johnson, who said "I have always said if you want a speech, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman."