Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of being foreign and suspicious looking has been perpetrated by coloureds.
The Mail can reveal that coloureds are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.
Amanda Platell said of the coloureds, "I have always said if you want a speech, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.".